Internet Advertising: Changing and Staying the Same…

November 12, 2009 at 2:30 pm (Internet surfing, Personal life) (, )

Ah… banner ads. Aren’t they inspiring? Yeah, not really. More like obnoxious. That’s the fun part about using Internet services, you get to see a lot of banners ads–those side and overhead bars of advertising that lure you in one way or another to click on them, only to be taken to this poorly designed website claiming something unrealistic and wanting your personal information to “sign up now!” or “buy this great product!”. I often wonder who designs banners ads, and who is gullible enough to click on them! It must be working great for them, because they’re still around!

The first banner ads I remember were ones the flashed in annoying bright colors telling me that I won!!! I was the 100,000th visitor (every single time!) or the ones telling me I have a virus or spyware or malware and would I like to clean my computer now? Just click here!

And there were the trivia questions. “What celebrity baby picture is this? Who’s lips/legs/eyes are these?” “What to you think about <current celebrity gossip or political candidate>?” The funny thing is, most of the time, the entire ad, including the white space is a clickable area, so you don’t even have to choose an ‘answer’ to be redirected! Seriously?!

My favorite banner ads were the interactive ones, where you had to punch, swat, hit, or outrun something, those are the good ones! They make you fight to get to the useless spam sites! ūüėÄ I found myself clicking on these just for fun… oh yes.. I know, the evils of clicking on banner ads… tsk tsk tsk! It was fun! My favorite was the spitting on pedestrians from the roof of a tall building one! You had to move back and forth along the roof and aim just right so it would actually hit them by the time it landed on the ground! Who comes up with this stuff?!

Then there’s the click on the ninja one before he disappears again one. The escape the angry bull one. The outrun the police one. The beat up the suma wrestler one. …and the list goes on!

Although the ‘goal’ is different, most banner ads haven’t changed much over the years. For example, now you can beat up Obama instead of beating up Bush! Ooo! Tempting!

And… *drumroll* The number one most obnoxious banner ad! dun dun dun! The Transform Your Body Banner Ads!!! Yuck! Who wants to see random pictures of people’s ugly before’s in comparison to their ‘hott’ after’s! Not me!

First there was the belly fat one. It would show someone’s sagging, oversized abdominal section, next to a skinny girl’s flat stomach. It was so obvious its a different person! She doesn’t have stretch marks!

Then there was the teeth one. GROSS! First we get to see someone’s dirty, stained teeth so we can see what pretty white teeth look like. I think we all don’t need to see enlarged images of ugly teeth to know the difference! (But hey, at least we got a break for them sagging stomaches!)

Oh, and the “I got fired and now I make thousands of dollars from home!” ads, showing pictures of people holding their gargantuan checks from Google or some other Internet company! Yeah, I’ll get right on that!

These banner ad people must’ve finally figured we don’t like seeing ugly pictures of people’s stomaches, so now they show ripped men’s chests with huge vein-covered bulging arms, bragging they’ll tell you how to get ripped!!! I had to laugh when I saw an ad of a before and after. The two images showed a matching tattoo on the man’s chest to prove it was the same guy! That’s ingenious!

This recent one takes the cake. Let’s not show gross teethsexy mouth chewing on glass... yeah. anymore! It’s the same advertisement about some single mom discovering the cure for white teeth and blah blah blah, but this time it shows sexy pictures of full, luscious lips and perfect white teeth, but they’re chewing on glass?!! Why?!!

So… in summary, lol, advertising on banner ads: they change. But they’re still the same. A waste of time hoping to catch some gullible victim with whatever dazzling tactic they come up with. Nice.

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The “Computer-dumb” People Are Very Smart

November 3, 2009 at 1:47 pm (Computers, Personal life) (, , )

This morning before coming to work, I was desperately trying to make some apple pies. Everything was becoming one sticky mess, and I was running out of time. I eventually gave everything up, left the unbaked crusts and half-finished pie filling behind, and ran out the door–after some hurried instructions to my mother to please do something with them ’til I got home. On the way to work, Mom I talked on the phone and she told me what I probably did wrong and that the pie crusts would be ok, but I want to throw them away!

This reminded me of my attempt only a few days ago to make the perfect chocolate chip cookies. I did everything I thought would make them special, but no. They ended up raising straight up and tasting dry and thick, instead of spreading out into large, round, chewy morsels of delight–like the ones My mom made last night! *sigh* ūüė¶ Maybe I’m not a baker after all.

While I was picking sticky pie dough off of my hands and the rolling pin and getting flour all over the floor, my mom was at the computer, trying to check her email. Now that I think back it makes me laugh. Mom was yelling from the office, asking me why the Internet isn’t working, and why the shortcut I made for her email is bringing up an error message, and I was in the kitchen yelling “what am I supposed to put in this next?!” We were both trying to do something the other was good at, and not being there to teach the other how to do what was common sense to us.

And then I realized that as many times as I want to roll my eyes that my mother can’t remember which icon to double-click, I will never remember the five (or maybe it’s six?) ingredients that go into pie crust dough! Everyone has skills, talents, and experience in different areas. So whether it’s tech supporting Internet services, or making pies and cookies, we all need each other and our smarts!

I think our society often pushes the older generations into a corner and pities them for not being able to keep up with the fast-moving technologically advancing world we ¬†are living in today. We forget that they knew enough to raise us and give us good advice, and that they have years on us of experience on how to lead, provide, communicate, and overcome obstacles. Their stories might sound different, but their life lessons are ones that still apply today. Lets give these “technologically-backward” folks another chance!

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Arts, crafts, and the Internet

October 27, 2009 at 11:37 am (Internet surfing, Personal life) (, )

I have¬†always enjoyed art–painting, drawing, sculpting–even music and drama. Now that I have graduated college and work full time, I try to keep the arts in my life. I also enjoy teaching, but try as I might, I don’t have a very commanding presence, so it’s hard for me to keep the attention of a large group of kids. You know how those teachers growing up were either so likeable or so scary that you listened when they talked? That’s my theory. They had the commanding presence, I don’t.

So, I never pursued teaching, but I still can do one on one or teach very small groups. I asked my aunt who homeschools her two children if I could teach them art as a part of her curriculum. She was very excited and, to my slight dismay, volunteered me to teach the children of three more homeschool families she knew.

I wasn’t sure if I was ready for this, but I accepted. Now to come up with an art project. I remembered a “ocean life” art class from my middle school involving chalk and stencils of sea creatures.

I couldn’t find said stencils anywhere (ok, I didn’t look very hard!) but I decided I preferred making my own stencils. Enter Internet Services! I just did a Google search for sea¬†animal stencils. I found the most fascinating and widest variety of sharks, dolphins, shells, and fish. It was so easy! And free! I then printed them out and tranferred the shapes to pieces of cardboard. Voila!

The class turned out very well! Part of that was probably because half of the kids didn’t show up. <_<¬†But even so, we all had fun and I’m looking forward to next month’s class. I even think I’ll be able to handle all four families.¬†In the meantime, I must say, the Internet’s vast resources never cease to amaze me!

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